Festering Streaker & Really Sadistic Bastard

FROM PATTAYA KLANG

Turn left and drive towards Bangkok then turn right towards Rayong on Highway 36.

Continue past the Regents School and the junction with Highway 7 and then turn left onto road 3240 just before the flyover.

Follow the 3240 for 7.5km to the traffic lights junction with Highway 331 and go straight ahead. (HHH).

Well now that my head is starting to clear a bit and ABBA is on at full blast, I can get on with this run report. To start with, unlike other hashes I have been to, I was asked to scribe before and not after the run. Great! I was bit apprehensive today as the last time I went along to a Festering Streaker affair; we were all out for more than 2 3/4 hours!!?
Thankfully, today’s run was not going to be like that at all so here we go ….. The hares: Festering Streaker and Really Sadistic B*****d gave us a brief description of what to expect on the run today including the colour of the paper (white) and checks (red). With that done, we were sent on our way straight through a cattle herd that had been slowly closing in on our pre run circle! So instead of charging off, we all had a nice slow and gentle walk, trying our best not to spook the livestock.
Within a hundred meters or so we saw our first paper and with the cattle behind us, off we ran through the shiggy. Before long we came upon some barbed wire which I don’t remember being warned about. I do remember the bit about snakes and sticks and cattle, but not barbed wire! Anyway, not too much of a problem as it was sort of marked with red paint!
On we went through the grazing stuff, more cattle and walking and then we hit it. Water of course! At this time of year it would be a surprise not to have the stuff blocking the trail. Someone had very kindly thrown an old dead broken down tree across a stream which was very nice.. Only problem was that once across our little bridge …… mud, lots and lots of mud and water ! And almost immediately after the mud, we hit the tapioca. Can’t really avoid this stuff these days around Pattaya but heck, it was thick and high. It’s good we did not have to go too far before we broke out onto a dirt track and our first check.
Up to this point, the pack was sort of out of synch. with the walker/runners (like me) taking point and the front runners stuck in the middle of the pack somewhere. However, now that we were on a real running trail, this changed with Rusty Ringhole and Jellobutt and a few others (including a few girls) taking over and basically doing their stuff. Within a short time the check had been solved and we were off. The hares took full advantage of the mass of junctions here as we hit a fair few checks within a very short time. This definitely held the pack together.
On we went through/around various pineapple and Tapioca fields, over gentle humps,
more tapioca fields, winding dirt tracks, coconut plantations, shiggy. I was really enjoying myself but then I noticed the long elephant grass in a bit of a dip, oh oh! This time there were no broken down trees, no bridges, no way around, only deep dirty water and mud winding through the long grass. And boy did it wind and wind. Seemed to go on forever, getting deeper and deeper! I had several girls in front of me and they were, well slightly stressed going by all the shouts and screams. Character, it’s great for all the characters to come out on the hash! Squeeze My Tube definitely showed some of hers in that water I can tell you!!? Good fun though as no snakes or leaches anywhere in sight and the poor girls having to accept their muddy fate!
By this time, the front runners were well gone and so is my memory I think! I digress, on we went and I noticed that the pack was strung out a bit after that water. I’m not sure that everyone got through which was just as well because after about 10 minutes running anti-clockwise, we hit water and mud again! After that it was more shiggy and back towards the A-site with one or two checks in the middle of nowhere designed probably just to confuse and slow down the front runners. We had one final barbed wire fence conveniently blocking our way just short of our car park. I really do mean blocking our way because most people walked or ran straight into it! Anyway, no harm done. Also, no rain, not too hot being slightly overcast, new running area near the 331 and back after 45 to 50 minutes. On the whole, it was a good varied trail with almost everything apart from mountain climbing and VV friendly creeks! Well done to the Hares.
On On Tampax